It's Never The Way You Plan It

If you've been reading this blog for a while, you might remember me talking about my husband losing his job a while ago. April 23^rd, to be exact. I'll never forget that day, and I'll never forget that phone call.

The day my husband lost his job he found himself in the office of his former boss, hoping he could pick up shifts. He was still considered a PRN (as needed) employee although he hadn't actually worked there in over a year. That morning, she had received notification from HR that she needed to officially terminate his PRN status since he hadn't been there in so long. As she was working on the paperwork she noticed she had a voicemail. It was my husband, and she desperately needed extra help at the hospital at that time. It meant a huge pay cut, night shifts, evening shifts, and weekends, and a lot of time alone at home by myself when I didn't want to be, but it was work. On the same day we got that terrible news God had provided for us. His perfect timing. Amazing. There was no doubt from day one that His hand was in it all.

Since that time we've struggled to put together enough shifts to pay the bills, had a thousand dollar car repair, had three promising jobs fall through, a lot of disappointment, a lot of frustration, and a lot of stress. But somehow, we've also managed to make every payment on time, found cash stuffed in our pockets and checks in the mail, and had a free stay at the beach and another in the mountains. God hasn't prevented hard things from happening, but at the same time He's provided for us in ways that only He can.

A couple months ago my husband was approached by an acquaintance about a potential job. He had a good first interview, an even better second interview, and heard from someone who knew someone that things were looking very promising and that a job offer from HR should be coming. After an eight week process, we found out that he hadn't gotten the job. Meanwhile, my brother had been pursuing a job opportunity for Eric at the place where he worked. We were both disheartened at that point, but he applied for it nonetheless. Last Monday, he had his first interview, Thursday he had his second, and Friday he got a job offer!

Just a couple hours after typing that last sentence, I found out that this company is now offering Eric 10% less than what he was told a few days ago. Not exactly what we wanted to hear. Yes, it's an answer to the employment problem, but it's not an answer to the debt problem or to the desire to start a family. Once again we find ourselves in a place where we feel like we'll be spinning our wheels, just like we've been doing for the last two and a half years.

The thing I have to remind myself is even if we feel like we're spinning our wheels, God's still got a hold of the car and He's moving it along just the way He wants to. Is it easy? Absolutely not. I feel like I've faced more disappointments this last year then was my fair share. So much that was within our grasp has been snatched away.

But when James says to "Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds" he means it. Because when it's all said and done, it's not about having comfort or an easy life or leftover money at the end of every month, it's about how I live this life, and how I serve my Savior.

He hasn't let go of us yet, and I know that He won't. Even when things don't go exactly the way I want or how I plan them, He still hasn't failed me.

Lamentations 3:22

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.

Emily